Wednesday, April 6, 2011

ABC's of Being a Top!

Everyone knows their ABC’s…or at least I hope you do.  So being a “good” top requires some work. Knowing your ABC’s or After, Before and Cleanliness is important. So we are going to talk a little bit about how to achieve this.  Just remember that this is for information purposes only and cannot replace the advice of a trained medical professional.

Before you engage in any sexual act with any partner make sure that you ask about your partner’s sexual history. Make it fun by looking at their pictures together. Talk about what you and he liked and disliked about the physical encounters.  This will help both of you understand how to make sex fun and hot.  This is also a good time to ask if they have any Sexually Transmitted Diseases or if they have ever been tested. 

If you were a scout you know that you should always be prepared! What does that actually mean?  It means that you should have your own supply of condoms and water-based lube.  Don’t trust that the other person will have some.  If you are out at the bar, condoms are likely available at the door, if you don’t see any ask the staff if there are any left.

When you have your condoms, make sure that the condom is new, not expired, does not have any visible signs of damage (tears, holes, etc.) and still has air in the packaging. You can check for air by squeezing the package gently between the thumb and index finger. 

If this is someone you talked to online, bring your own condoms and lube with you.  Make a little hook-up kit!  (We’ll tell you how to do that later)  Keep you hook-up kit is a safe place that is easy to access. Don’t leave your condoms in your car or wallet, temperature changes can damage the condom!


Your body is a temple, so make sure you treat it the same way.  Keep it clean! Make sure that there are no abrasions on the penis, unusual discharge, bumps, or rashes.  Just make sure that everything is on the up and up, down under.  Do this inspection in the mirror, it will help you to understand your body and know what your body looks like so that if anything changes you will know.  This will also give you a great chance to do a self testicular exam, which needs to be performed once a month.   Watch this Video to see how it is done.

(Spoiler Alert: This video contains you couldn't figure that out...but you should know that it is NSFW and if you are offended by seeing a medical video of a naked man getting a testicular exam then you shouldn't watch it!)


As they say, Cleanliness is next to Godliness!  Make sure that you are washing your genital area every day.  This will ensure that penis is clean from any debris or dirt that may be present. Use a mild soap with no fragrances to avoid irritation. If you are uncircumcised (uncut) pull back the foreskin and clean underneath it.  


If you chose to shave or wax the pubic area know how to care for that area.  The pubic area is more sensitive than the face.  There can be some mishaps if you shave the pubic area.  For example: itching, irritation, rash, and Folliculitis* to name a few.  You can use baby powder to help keep everything dry and fresh when you work out.  Just make sure that you wash it off before having sex. If there are any nicks, cuts, or irritation I would recommend that you do not engage in sexual activity until that heals.  If you continue to have irritation after shaving or waxing, stop and see a doctor. 

*Folliculitis is the inflammation of one or more hair follicles. The condition may occur anywhere on the skin.


After having sex, make sure that you pull out of your partner all the way.  If you used a condom walk away from you partner and take the condom off and throw it away.  You may also have an urge to urinate; do not hold it in this will help to flush out bacteria. 

You should try to clean yourself as soon as you can after sex.  Pay special attention to the genital area and get it nice and clean.  Again, if you are uncircumcised, pull back the foreskin and clean that area as well.  Take this time to inspect your genital area for any irritation, bumps or abrasions that might have occurred during sex.

If at anytime you have any unusual discharge, pain during urination or ejaculation, sores, or swollen testicles, you should seek medical attention immediately. This may be a sign of an STD or other complications. If you have any questions about the signs or symptoms of STD’s click here.

So, now that you know the ABC’s of being on Top. Go out there and be the best Top you can be.  They always say practice makes perfect, just make sure that you always wear the proper safety equipment.  You would not jump out an airplane without a parachute!